A friend recently told us they had been reading some of our older articles and really enjoyed one titled Just Grow Up! They said it made them laugh, but it also made them think, so we went back and read it. Sometimes it's funny to reread something you have written, especially when you don't really remember what it was about, and sometimes it really doesn't seem like we have written some of these articles, it must have been somebody else. This is one of those. If you're relatively new to the blog, or if you have been reading for a while, we hope you enjoy this article, which we wrote about a year ago. One thing that struck me was the question about whether we are better off now than we were a year ago. Let us know what you think.
Until next time - Fern
Originally published November 1, 2014
Just Grow Up!
know, sometimes there are people that just won't grow up. They want
someone else to do everything for them, make decisions for them, make
sure they don't fail, tell them how and what to think, and just in
general present themselves as whiny, sniveling, dependent pests. Fern
doesn't care much for whiners. Well, that wasn't very nice was it? But
it's true. Sorry, but some people may find this post to be a tad bit
irritating and others may find it to be offensive. If you find it
offensive, then let us apologize now. If you find it irritating, good.
are many people that just can't make a decision. They waffle back and
forth, and back and forth, until they've dug a trench in the ground deep
enough to bury themselves, and still no decision has been made. One
time Frank was in a staff meeting where the decision of the day was what
color table cloth to put on a table for a student event. After 45
minutes of discussion, still no decision was made, and Frank was just
about to lose his mind. Frank is a very decisive person. He considers
the information presented, analyzes the situation and makes a decision.
If it is something that is imminent, he has a decision made in a matter
of minutes or seconds. If it is something that can wait, he will take
more time to ponder things. The ability to make a decision is one of the
things that made Frank a very effective school principal. He was once
in a meeting where the athletic director was being questioned about
something that had happened. We always admired the response the director
gave when he was questioned. "It was my call, and I made it." That's
it. Situation, analysis, decision.
that continually sway back and forth will be greatly taxed to decide
what to do when faced with a life and death survival situation. That
indecisiveness may be the death of everyone involved. Even if it is the
wrong decision, in most situations a decision must be made. Hopefully if
the wrong decision is reached, there will be time to correct it or
recover from it, but standing by and wringing your hands is not the
thing to do. Decide and take action instead of wasting precious time
wondering what to do, or waiting for someone else to decide for you.
has people contact him about radio information. "What is the best
radio?" And he repeatedly responds, there is no best radio, there is no
best gun, there is no best truck. Frank is always polite, of course, but
in the real world, he is not always polite. He reminds people of the
old saying, "If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen." You
see, he can't decide what radio is best for someone. He has decided what
radio is best for him. He has decided that multiple times. And next
month, he may decide that there is another best radio for him. But, all
of these are his choices. We all learn everyday. Sometimes we get new
information, but we can't always wait for that perfect, in this case,
radio. New and improved is not always better.
comes a time when you have to decide what is best for you, your family
and sometimes your community. Frank has been known to tell people,
"Start at the shallow end of the pool and work your way in." If you
can't swim, don't jump into the deep end of the pool. Frank has a name
for that, he calls it stupid. Start at the shallow end, take your time.
No one says you have to go to the deep end any time soon. That's your
decision, and your choice, when you do that. Frank, in his gentle
demeanor, has insinuated to folks that if you're afraid to get into the
shallow end of the pool, then go back and play in the kiddie pool.
Everything is safe in the kiddie pool, because the kiddie pool always
has adult supervision.
might sound a little harsh. It might sound even a little bit cruel, but
indecisiveness, especially paralyzing indecisiveness, can stagger any
form of growth. So, what color of table cloth did they decide at that
Christmas meeting? Red, green, red, green? Instead of being a two hour
decision, in Frank's mind it was a two second decision. Little
background here. This was one day at school where they were going to
show a video. There was a table at the back of the room, one table, with
cookies and chips, in a semi dark room. Well, I can't decide. Green or
red?? Five adult educators, two hours later, and no decision. There are
reasons why some people drink.
It doesn't make any difference what gun you choose, because it is your
choice. But people will debate to the end of the earth which caliber is
best to stop a 190 pound deer. It's an endless discussion. The Ford,
Chevy, Dodge debate will go on until we go back to horse and wagon. I'm
not even going to address sporting events. Making a decision is as easy
as flipping a coin. Now this is from Frank. Grow up, man up and do what
is right. And then you hear this whining sound. But what if I don't make
the right decision? Then call up your mommy and ask her! And if your
decision doesn't work out for you, you can always blame the former
administration. I'm sorry, I meant to say, the way you were raised.
I said earlier. Grow up and man up, and make a decision. More people
have been killed or hurt by indecisiveness, not by wrong decisions, but
by no decisions. If your family is in danger, what are you going to do?
Stand there and chew on your fingernails and wet your pants? Can't you
see the storms coming? Take a time frame of five years and look back
five years. Look at every major factor that affects your lives, and tell
me if any one of them is getting better. And you seriously believe that
in the next five years that things are going to get better?
doesn't make any difference whether you bug in, bug out, but you've got
to get off of the fence and make a decision. And if you can't make a
now, when are you going to? Well, I don't know what my neighbors would
think if I were to store food. Who cares?? It's none of their business.
Well, I've read that a 223 is too small. I've read that a 9mm is too
small. Excuse me here, but there have been more humans stopped with a
223, which is a 5.56, in modern times than any other round. What is the
debate? Well, I want a 7.62 x 39. Then get one! Quit reading and get
which ever one you want, but decide! The 9mm issue. But a .45 has better
stopping power. Can't deny that, especially if a man is running at you
with a spear. But the 9mm has sent more people to heaven than the .45
has. Let's see, give me a choice, 9mm seventeen shots, .45 maybe ten
shots. You decide, but do it today. And if you can't decide, flip a coin
and go with whichever way it lands. Do you need somebody to tell you
what kind of coin to flip? Once you make a decision, don't go back and
second guess yourself. This activity is counter productive. Look
forward, not backwards. Do this a few times and it will get much easier.
comes a time in life where we have to step up to the plate, and I'm
speaking to the men here primarily. You will never get on base, much
less make it home if you are afraid to step up to the plate and take a
swing. A boss of mine years ago told me more than once, "It's time to
put on your big girl panties and make a decision." Or....there is the
kiddie pool, but I guarantee you, the big pool is significantly more
gratifying. Now what shall I have to eat? Scrambled eggs or fried eggs?
Frank & Fern